Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose. (Proverbs 18:21 NIV)

I just finished reading a book on communication titled War of Words by Paul Tripp. It is an excellent book that I recommend everyone take the time to read. I have never come across a more detailed biblical treatment of communication. In the first part of the book he deals with where the struggle with words comes from

Many of the problems we experience when talking with one another emerge from the fact that we have usurped the authority of God: We say what we want to say, when and how we want to say it. We speak as if we are in charge and as if we have the right to use words to advance our purpose, and to achieve what would make us happy (pp. 20-21).

Words are powerful. We have the ability and freedom to choose when it comes to words. We can choose to use our words as weapons to destroy our “enemy” or we can choose to use them as loving building blocks shoring up another person’s insecurities. And there are all kinds of avenues through which we can use our words…

1. Verbal: This is what we say to each other. It’s the stuff of everyday life. Verbal communication is something that is unavoidable. It is almost impossible to make it through any day without saying something to somebody (unless we are trapped alone on a deserted island).

2. Written: The unique thing about writing is that you can edit. This is so cool! I write about 4,500 words a week. I remember writing papers in college and seminary all the while dreaming of the day when I would be released from the “writing prison” and enter ministry. Boy was I fooled. I have come to love writing, but just wish someone would read my words.

3. Body Language: A very powerful way we communicate is often through what is not said but the way our body says what we say. Are our arms folded? What is the expression on our face? Do we maintain eye contact? Often we communicate detachment just by the way we present ourselves to somebody. An important key I have learned over the years is to be genuine when I ask about how someone is doing. I have to consciously tell myself to stop, look the person in the eye, sit down if they are sitting, and shut my mouth when they are telling me about how they are doing.

Use your words wisely, here’s talking with ya!

Grace & Peace, Scott